Two Monks and a Woman

After reading Yolanda’s comments about an ex who still lingers in her memory after he had left her about a year ago, I decide to post this story for her:

A senior monk and a junior monk were travelling together. Towards midday, they came to a river. As they are about to cross the river, they spotted a young, beautiful woman. When the woman asked the monks for help to cross the river, the senior monk obliged and carried her across on his shoulder.  He set her down on the opposite shore and carried on his journey with the junior monk without saying a word. The junior monk seemed upset and perturbed by the whole incident.

After a long walk, the senior monk noticed that the junior monk was particularly quiet and asked, “You seemed upset. Is something bothering you?”

The junior monk replied, “We monks had taken a vow of celibacy and are not permitted to have any contact with a woman and especially not the physical kind.  How could you carry her on your shoulders?”

“Hmm, I have left her on the riverbank hours ago, yet you are still carrying her in your mind.” replied the senior monk.

In retrospect, Yolanda, you can choose the path of the senior monk, who had embrace the situation of the moment and continue to live in the present after leaving the woman on the river bank. Or you could be like the junior monk who is still carrying the baggage of the past.

The choice is yours. This is your life. If you put down the baggage, you may move ahead faster and there may be many wonderful things ahead in your life and they are expecting you. Are you ready to embrace the moment and live life to the fullest?

The choice, ultimately, is still yours…

The Men Rules: A Woman’s Instant Guide to the Mindset of Men [Part 1]

The following are a set of rules. These rules does speak for the majority of the male population (men who don’t think so are welcome to comment). Whoever wrote this is brilliant. It is periodically splashed across the internet but I can’t seem to pinpoint to the original author (though I would readily acknowledge his work and his brilliance).

Women who are seeking to know men better would find theses rules helpful. Women who chose to ignore these rules do so at their own risk. All rules are numbered as #1, so I presume they are of equal importance.

1. Breasts are for looking at and that’s why we do it. Don’t try to change that.

[This is the first on the list, so it must be the most important rule. Only a fraction of men will admit to this. Those who do are the real men. Those who don’t are liars, are afraid to admit it and try to act “holier than thou”. Ladies, stay away from these men.]

1.  Learn to work the toilet seat. You’re a big girl. If it’s up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don’t hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

[Folks, don’t be surprise how much of an issue this could be…]

1. Saturday = sports. It’s like the full moon or the changing of tides. Let it be.

[This is a favorite. Sports is rather sacred to men. Of course, this doesn’t apply to fags.]

1. Shopping is NOTa sport. And no, we are never going to think of it that way.

[This is consistent with the above rule. And for men who suffer from self-esteem problems, who need to modify their car to impress girls cos they don’t have the self confidence or the looks, modifying your car is NOT a sport either, you loser.]

1. Crying is blackmail.

[This one speaks for itself.]

More rules to come…

Two Screen Legends for the Price of One

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DeNiro and Pacino Reunited. Two of the finest actors of their generation. Two of my favorites.

This will be their third collaboration. Their first was in 1974. The movie was Godfather Part II. DeNiro played Pacino’s father and appeared in flashbacks. Back then, they were both not so known Italian American actors.

Today, they are screen icons.

They never shared a scene together. Not until 21 years later.
In 1995, they both starred in a cops and robbers thriller, Heat where they shared two brief scenes together.

Between them, they shared 3 Oscars and 11 nominations.

Next year, they will be collaborating again on a new movie called Righteous Kill.

I am looking forward to it. Hopefully, there will be more screen time between DeNiro and Pacino. But I know there will be lots of testosterone-filled moments in the movie.

I can’t wait.

How to Deal with Your Boyfriend When His Favorite Team is On a Losing Streak…

It has been a bad stretch for my favorite team as they have just registered their 6th lost. 6 losses in a row for a promising team that was in the NBA conference finals last season? I find it hard to accept.

And to make matters worse, most girls do not understand the importance of sports to men.

So, for the ladies out there who have to deal with the everyday reality of your boyfriend sulking because his favorite team loses, here are some tips to deal with it.

Ok, one important tip is not to say anything smart like “sports are about wins and loses”. Because, the most likely answer you get (with a grunt) is “Yeah? I know. How about my team wins and other team loses?”

Take the low road and remember, the keyword is: COMPASSION. You are dealing with a very sensitive subject here.

Be there for your partner. It hurts. Like death in the family. Lend them your ears. Let them whine. Help them get over it. Never laugh or chastised them. Never use the word “condolences”.

Unless you want to risk the relationship. Or see a man experience PMS.

Don’t force the issue. If they don’t want to talk about it, fine. Just stay with them.

Divert his attention to something else. Perhaps a hobby that he had neglected. Something which he likes and had not done for a long time like a night out with his buddies or fishing.

Cheer him out. Treat him to a night out. A movie or dinner would be good. Tell him it is his evening and he get to make choices where and when to go. Just make it clear that it is on you.

And lastly, don’t try to understand this erratic behavior. It is a testosterone thing. It just how real men are wired. Those who take their sports seriously. And their team.

Shoe Marks on Toilet Seats

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Two things that piss me off the most about public washrooms in malls across the city are the presence of female cleaners and shoe marks on toilet seats.

Cleanliness of toilets is important no doubt and the cleaners are there to ensure that. But not when it becomes a place where they meet and chat. I even caught one trying to peek at me while I was taking a leak. I kid you not folks. And it’s not even funny.

The other thing that I really don’t get is the barbaric act of treating every single toilet as a squat toilet even in new malls where pristine, clean and shiny toilet seats are new and unseasoned. This is 2008 and there are many uncivilized people running around town.

New toilets seats have scratches and marks left behind by the pressure caused by the soles of shoes. If only there were a device that would automatically jab ones butt when it detects the presence of shoes on toilet seats. That would be cool and I would be laughing. J

Then, there are some uncivilized bozos who smoke in mall toilets.

Guys and Romantic Comedies

Men on the majority enjoy testostorone-filled movies that is chock full of violence, gore and action. When Gladiator hit the screen, it was a huge success with men for all its fight scenes, machoism and ‘honor’ themes.

What is a guy’s take on romantic comedies (romcom for short)? You guys can’t ONLY be watching flicks that you like and leave the women out. I mean, if a woman agrees to watch a ‘guy flick’ with you doesn’t mean she enjoys the movie. It only means that she wants you to enjoy the movie and be happy.

To make a relationship work, and to earn “extra points” from a woman you are dating, watching a romcom is one way to ignite a romantic realtionship. And there’s mothing better than a quiet evening watching a romcom DVD with your date.

Here, I present you my Top 10 Favorite Romantic Comedies:

1. The Lake House

2. 50 First Dates

3. Love, Actually

4. The Wedding Singer

5. Bridget Jones’ Diary

6. Four Weddings and A Funeral

7. Sleepless In Seattle

8. As Good As It Gets

9. Joe Vs the Volcano

10. While You Were Sleeping

Love or Compatibility?

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It started with Jasmine’s proposal to Honey Bee to date some older women for research and blogging purposes:

Jasmine: well… since dating older women is a popular trend now, i was just curious to know how it’s like. I thought you would too.

Honey bee: why don’t u date a schoolboy and find out?

Jasmine: i would…but that’s illegal.

Honey bee: i m not curious. Get one who’s 18.

Jasmine: even that… i won’t consider. Not even 23.

Honey bee: y?

Jasmine: not even 24. get it now?

Honey bee: ahh, immaturity

Jasmine: Why would I find someone to babysit when i have lots of real babies and kids to play with?

i am not into babysitting big babies

Honey bee: n someone said i was picky

u just took one big baby for ring shopping that day.

Jasmine: yea…that’s for charity. He was getting ready to propose to his gf and I got to pick out the ring. And he is 28, by the way.

Honey bee: 28 is still too young?

Jasmine: it’s not about numbers. You didn’t see how he acted at the jewelry store. i almost walked out.

Honey bee: really? what did he do?

Jasmine: You would think if someone is ready to propose and get a ring, he would have done some basic research. Come on… google about rings. Or at least find out what style she likes. I don’t mean to know the exact ring she wants. But at least have a basic idea.

Honey bee: yup i agree

does he have the ring size?

Jasmine: there…!!! you just nailed it.

no ring size!

Honey bee: haha

Jasmine: and we were there to buy an engagement ring…hello??? What was he thinking?

Honey bee: he was also wasting your time

Jasmine: sigh…steal a ring from her jewelry box.

measure her finger when she’s asleep.

cut her finger.

just do something

Honey bee: yeah… just do n imprint will do

Jasmine: sometimes little things show a lot about someone

Honey bee: it does

especially to women

Jasmine: it made me wonder… did he wake up one morning and thought it would be a great day to buy a ring?

Honey bee: women are more meticulous

maybe he did

Jasmine: ask u one question. is it love or compatibility? which one?

Honey bee: what do u mean?

Jasmine: when two people decide to be together, “fall” in love and get married. which one is more important? love or compatibility?

Honey bee: initially love

then some level of compatibility will develop or else they would fall out of love

Jasmine: aha

Honey bee: its like an orbital thing

boy meet girl

boy falls in love w girl

boy n girl dates

know more abt each other

helps each other grow.

if the balance tips, then sooner or later they will fall out

i think it is a complimentary relationship

Jasmine: see… something is really wrong with me…i have long since believe in that “routine”

although i know that’s how things work most of the time

Honey bee: not always

that’s a common way of looking at it

it could work in reverse

or it could start in the middle

there are not hard n fast rules

Jasmine: the problem with feelings and love is… they come and go

Honey bee: yup, the real test is after the feeling is gone

Jasmine: exactly…

Honey bee: companionship comes in

Jasmine: so the way i like to put it is: fall in love for the right reasons

Honey bee: u still enjoy each others company n do things together. well, sometimes u r not in control when it comes to love.

now it’s the question of logic vs feelings

Jasmine: yes and no. because if you know what you are looking for, you are naturally attracted to some people and not others

when you don’t know what you want, then you don’t stand a chance of falling in love for the right reasons.

Well folks out there, what’s your say on this?