10 Things a Guy Does When He Is Into You


Women are usually more sensory acute than men. They are more intuitive in detecting emotions and when a guy is interested. But there are times that you will meet a guy who is overly shy and discreet in expressing his feelings.

For the ladies out there who are curious (and sometimes clueless) as to how a guy feels about you, here are some signs/indications. Bear in mind, these are only indications and you need to calibrate his behaviors before making your conclusions:

1. He will be distracted when you are nearby and will steal glances at you and if you do notice him, he might look inconspicuous and pretends to look elsewhere.

2. He laughs at your jokes even if they are lame and no one laughs. If he is the office idiot, this one doesn’t count.

3. He may get nervous and stutters when he speaks to you [provided that he does not stutter in normal circumstances]. This is akin to the phenomenon when one gets tongue tied, head over heels and world got turned upside down. It has something to do with the bodily chemicals when one is in love.

4. He listens to you and remembers everything that you say, no matter how insignificant or crappy those things are.

5. He makes time and does little tasks and favors when you ask him. Just make sure that he is not the office ‘doormat’ that does things for everybody.

6. He notices new things about you and compliments you on your new hairdo, new dress, new shoes, etc.

7. He appears jealous when you are with another guy. According to Dr. David Buss in his book, The Dangerous Passion: Why Jealousy is as Necessary as Love and Sex, jealousy is a defense shield of love that men use to fend off constant threat from rivals and the possibility of betrayal from a partner.

8.  He treats you a little different than how he treats other girls. Somehow, because he thinks of you a lot, he subconsciously displays more affection for you without realizing it.

9.  He talks and looks at you differently than other people. It could be a longer eye contact or a more distinct smile when he talks to you.

10. When you are conversing with him and your friends, he responds mostly to you and not so much to your other friends. He looks at you whenever you speak and he may act as if your other friends do not really exist.

With all being said, the most ideal way to find out is to ask him if he is interested in you or drop hints. Anyway, most girls are pretty intuitive. If you get the feeling that he likes you, he probably does.

A special message to Valerie, who wrote in with this question: I hope this will help and all the best to you.

38 thoughts on “10 Things a Guy Does When He Is Into You

  1. Amazing information. I really appreciate this article! I really enjoyed #1 as I was taking it as he was flirting with me a lot then he seen I started reciprocating and thought he was backing off.

    • I experienced that myself, so I decided to ask him out for dinner and he said he was flattered and that he couldn’t because he was in a relationship, so I told him, if it didn’t work our for you two, to feel free to contact me, and he said ok, I will… so you never know he might be in a relationship. Does any one want to respond to what I just said what happened to me.

  2. I’ve liked this guy for a few years now. But we’re in two different social circles. Since of lately I noticed that every time I look at him I get caught – or should I say he gets caught? I don’t know. One night he was making a speech and I just happened to look at him and he started stuttering mid-sentence and forgot what he was about to say. Thing is, I don’t know if he found out that I’m attracted to him or if he genuinely likes me.

    • I think he is attracted to you. The signs to look out for is – “does he stutter in mid-sentence all the time or only when you look at him?” That would be a great indication.

  3. Have a man that flirts with me, when I flirt with him he doesnt flirt as much (hopes that make sense) we have been out a least three times. think he’s more comfortable on the phone when he flirts he seems to speak more freely.compliments me on my smile and how much enjoys spending time with me, very respectable such a mans’s man. Sends mixed signals though, He likes me but seem very guarded, dont really want to show my true feelings, dont want to be rejected.I find myself thinking about him throughout the day.

    • Perhaps he feels more comfortable on the phone. Perhaps he is the conservative type that wants to be sure and wants the friendship to develop further. Do not use your logical mind to judge but instead rely on your instincts. For women, this comes more naturally, so use it.

  4. This guy, did alot of things that I think he might interested in me. Like he once SMS me in the middle of the night and ask me am I asleep. And once I caught him staring at me. And he said because I am beautiful. And many other things. My friend said he is definitely interested in me. But when I told them he is my boss ( he older than me by 13 years.) plus he is a quite famous in singapore. And my friend immediately change their opinon, say that is different. Because by his status, wealth and look. He is a very eligible bachelor. What do u think?

    • Well, there could be many possibilities. Maybe he is interested or maybe he is just looking for a fling. Check with other colleagues to find out his previous behavioral patterns.

  5. i like one of my friends and he acts all tough wen he with me and his other friends then when hes with me hes nice. then he asked one of our friends if i liked him and she told him the truth then she told me. i asked him out and he said no so im confused. i was wonderin do yo think he doesnt like me and he lied or he does like me but hes not ready

  6. I’ve started to like this guy , I hang around with him a lot and when we are leaving he always gives my friends a hug , but when he is huging me he always pics me up , he’s always smiling at me , and all my friends say they think he likes me but he doesn’t speak to me outside of college unless I message him first , surely if he liked me he would message me first and want to speak to me , I’m scared of telling him I like him incase he doesn’t like me , I always mess things up :| , I’m so confused please help ?

    • Well, from the looks of it, it seemed like he is only friendly. There is no real indication that he likes you. I guess you need to pick up more signals or indicators of interest first. Do drop hints and see how he respond to it.

  7. I am married n had recently moved somewhered i frequently hung around before. Though i did not really converse with the people on the block we spoke my husband started noticing the guy next door starring @ me and comming closer alot more within a months time. He asked me was i “doing ” something to him for thisx behavior to occur. I looked at him like he was crazy. T ime passed it became obvious to me that this guy was playing flirty shy games with me even while my husband was around. I explained to my hubby i see what he ment but there is nothing going on. I was tired of being accused so attempted to ask the guy but he just starred at me and then turned his head.huh? But eveytime he sees me or my hubby he would speak and wave.Well needless to say he got tired of it and asked him whats going on.He exclaimed he did not know what he was talking about and how he thoght they were cool. Also went so far as I was trying to start a fight. What???? He still plays the eye game whther i catch him or not, but even more when the hubby is around.I try to ignore him but my husband cant. He has become more irritating telling me about this man. Why cant he ignore him. I mean he told me and hubby he wasnt interested in me.what is going on I am about to move myself from both situations

    • well, this person should not be a distraction that come between you and your husband. Men needs assurance sometimes, so when the neighbor starts flirting with you, just assure your husband that you have only him in your heart. This can be achieve by performing a loving gesture to your husband such as holding on to him, a peck on the check or a putting your arms around his choulder. This will also give your neighbor a signal that you are not interested in him. It is a double-edged sword.

  8. I’ve liked this guy for about four or five months now. He was in my sign language class, but I wasn’t sure how to start talking to him. We finally ended up becoming really good friends after I just blurted something out to him, and we still are. A while after we became friends, he said the reason he didn’t talk to me first was because he’s shy.

    Lately though, he drops somewhat cryptic messages and I can’t tell if he’s just being friendly, or WHAT.

    For example. Every morning we sit together at a table, drink coffee, and literally just talk for an hour. But he gets all weird and moody whenever my other guy friend joins us.

    He remembers almost everything I’ve ever said, kidding or not, and he’s said himself that his memory isn’t even that good.

    And we have this joke where we pretend he’s just “hired” to be my friend. And one time, I told him to quit, and he said he’d rather be fired. And then I said it would be easier if he quit before he got stuck, and he told me to stop trying to get rid of him because I’m the one who’s stuck.

    The last one in particular…I have no idea what that means, and he wouldn’t explain.

    • You are dealing with a shy guy and he has dropped you many hints that he is into you. If you like him, then you should start dropping hints too, even non-subtle ones. Sounds promising.

  9. Hey.. Well i met this guy because of my best mate.. The first time he saw he quickly came to me and talk.. We had a nice chat.. That night.. We went clubbing.. And my best mate forced me to dance with him.. Well she asked me the favor, at the begining i said no.. But i ended up dancing with him.. And well it went from dancing- flirting. And he was cuddling me like he didnt want me to go.. We even told me. The problem is i left like for two months. But since i left we he keeps in texting me.. We talk everyday.. And he is even gonna come to visit me for two weeks.. And he tease me a lot and of course flirt.. He said he likes me a lot.. But is hard for me to believe that i was thinking he just wants sex.. Cause he asked me if i am gonna sleep over in his hotel, without knowing me.. I have this feeling he just wants sex, could i be wrong?

    • Well, it seemed like he is flirting with you and coming on strong. Trust your intuition. Your immediate feeling is probably right. If you really want to see if you can go on a relationship with this guy, perhaps you can explore further by going on a date. Sleep over? It might not work to your benefit.

  10. I have this staff of mine.. i liked him from the beginning. I’m not sure if he likes me too but I noticed him he mimicked me and he teased me a lot and when he saw that Im almost angry at him, he tapped my shoulders and comfort me by telling me that all he want is to see me smiling. He laughs a lot at me even though im not making any jokes he just laughs in the middle of our conversation most of the time and he keeps on smiling. and even call me names and every time he enters in the office he has this smile on his face

    • He sure is trying to get your attention and all action indicates that he is interested. Just to make sure – calibrate his actions – does he do what you have described with other female colleagues or is it just you? If that is his norm, then he is just being nice to everyone. Otherwise, he seemed interested.

  11. I went to Brittany in france and on the ferry me and my 2 mates were playing ping pong and I was the only one who could play properly, one of my mates hit the ball so hard it was almost going over bored and the other crushed another ball with her foot. Me and my mates were worrying about what the staff would do and say and then one of them ran up to this guy and said ”hay!you!…excuse me could you get our ball for us” I said ”he could fall if he try’s to get it leave him alone” he said reashoreingly “its ok we’ll get it later I was watching you play earlier do you want me to help teach your sisters haw to play” I simply looked dawn blushing when one of my mates exclaimed “actually were her best mates and its obvious that you like like her so could you hurry up and play against her!” My other friend said “what’s your name” he told us his name and we played a game of ping pong and we accompanied each other for the rest of the day we recovered one ping pong ball but he took the blame for the crushed one so that we didn’t get groaned at by the staff the time came To separate and we exchanged numbers and shook hands and he went dawn the hall and I was walking up a flight of stairs when suddenly I lost my footing,slipped and rolled all the way back dawn. He ran over and helped me to my feet I burst out lapping said thanks and good bye for the second time and found mysalf staring in his eyes all day he kept dropping what I thought were hints But am not sure do you think he likes me

  12. My boyfriend and i were together for around 3 weeks. I thought he loves me he alwats sent text messeges and call me for 2 weeks regularly. But he wants me to be jealous he even told me to check him out in facebook, his comments etc. but i didnt feel jealous he again told me that i was not jealous and on that night he didnot reply my sms and when i check facebook he posted that he found one girl beautiful.I got irritated and never contact him anymore.he also didnot contact me.What should i do?pliz help

    • 3 weeks? If you are not the jealous type and he wants you to be jealous then I think there is something wrong with his self esteem. Since both are you are not in touch anymore and he doesn’t bother to contact you, best is to move on. Someone better out there is waiting for you…

  13. I like this guy for about 1 year and i thought that he liked me because he looked at me very much.Now he is my friend because we talk on social network. He calls me with a cute name.The first time i met him he helped me to cached something.Onetime he told me that you are more beautiful with curlys.My friend belives that he likes me but the problem is that he told me one day that he has a girlfriend.I dont know what to do? If he doesent like me why he text me firts or why he stares at me.I really dont know.And i forgot he is a shy guy.Please help me!

  14. Went on an interview and “he” was there being that he was the Senior Engineer. He seemed very awkward on the interview? He couldn’t look at me at by the end of the interview.
    Nevertheless, I started the job and became the Supervisor and he was the Manager. We began to communicate often about various things.
    He came by my office on Valentine’s day and shared a funny story about a hospital stay he had. We laughed so much. He texted “glad to make your day”.
    We went to lunch one time only and talked about past relationships and how we were both single, no kids and never married. He paid for lunch and carried our food to the table. Lots of laughter and deep eye contact.
    Unfortunately, I was let go from the company…
    I asked him could he be a reference for me when I apply to another company. His response was sure no problem, but is there anything else you need? How is life? I’m here if you need me, miss u 2″.
    What is he saying?? Is he interested?
    I really would like to date him…even told him if we were not co-workers he’s would be my type. Now we are not! Lol

  15. Hey ~ well, I met the guy I like at tuition. The teacher put us nxt to each other so we started talking. He is rlly sweet and he volunteers to help me with questions I don’t know even though I didn’t ask him for help. He remembers almost everything I say. He also waits for me after class even though I didn’t ask him to. My friends also told me that he likes me. I felt that he might like me. However, when my fren asked him anonymously on askfm if he has a crush on anyone, he replied that he doesn’t have a crush on anyone. Does that means that he doesn’t like me but only treated me as a fren? He also told me that he is very shy and that he feels crappy about himself. We both sixteen. Pls help

  16. I need advice. I like this guy and we met at work about 2 months ago. From the start we just ‘click’ I guess because we started telling jokes and just laughing without even knowing each other names. After we presented each other we start talking more and from nowhere we hang out and all just the 2 of us but we are just friends. Well thatd what we told everyone at work and each other. But I do like him and at the first hang out he ask me if he can kiss me and I let him. We just click. :) we have fun when we are together, we flirt and help each other…we are too honest and I dont know how but we trust each other. He is moving half and hour from where I live but we even joked about been roomates and transfer to the same college. I get jealous and he get jealous too, we have things in common. We are really good friends in a short time but I think he doesn’t want me in that way. I have told him I lije him and I think first time in my life I may be falling in love. Idk what to do. I am not scared to say to him what I feel but I don’t want to make the qrong move if he doesn’t feel the same. He does everything that is list above. The 10 of them and more. Everybody tell me tgat he likes me that we can’t be just friends when we feel more than that for each other. But he told me we r just friends. What should I do?

  17. I have learned the hard way more than once that when a guy asks you out, it is important to do 3 very specific things:

    – Let him know you want to make sure that you are clear and there are no understandings and ask him “Are you asking me out on a date or would we be just going out as friends?”
    – Ask up front if he is interested in you and attracted to you?
    – About 4 – 6 weeks into it double check to make sure that nothing has changed and he has not put you in the friend’s zone. It is amazing how some of these guys can flip-flop and never tell you.

    Do not become sexually intimate with anyone until you have clarified this.

    I have not seen this in any rules of dating but it is really key in this new era of friends with benefits and booty calls.

  18. I love you guys answers it’s everything I’ve been looking for. Sometimes people don’t feel confident in there judgment of the opposite sex. So by reading your articles gives us the answers to our questions!!! Thank TOYA!!!

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