My close friend, Alice, is having a cold war with her hubby, and it has lasted for two weeks now. The issue? MONEY. She got promoted at work and now she makes more ‘blink blink’ than he does.
Who knew a little extra money could create such a rife?
No doubt, money is a reality and a necessity. In fact, money is the symbol for success, security, status, independence, control, competence, comfort, and the list just goes on and on.
Women who think that “Yeah, I make more money than he does, but we’re living in the new millennium. What’s the big deal?” need to rethink that. No matter how much he loves you, the issue of money is the issue of EGO.
Men want to be providers because it is a caveman instinct. They hunt for the food and women take care of the kids. No matter how much society has changed, that part is still a strong part of their DNA.
Being a provider gives him a sense of identity, a purpose of existence, a motivation to face challenges everyday, a goal to work hard for, and a great sense of accomplishment when he succeeds in doing that. To him, providing for his family is the most direct, practical, and genuine way of saying “I love you” and “I honor my commitment to my marriage and family.”
Well, this is an ego thing and you got to live with it.
Filed under: Other Life Hazards, Relationship, She Says | Tagged: money, she earns more than him, she makes more money than he
This is definitely an ego thing and it’s ridiculous. Who cares who brings home more money as long as the money’s coming in and things are taken care of? This shows the insecurity and selfishness of the husband.
I think we use the whole “provider” scenario as an excuse. It’s not an identity nor a purpose of existence that solely rests on the man’s shoulder anymore like in the cavemen days, and it’s not a part of our DNA. Saying that helps us to keep using it as an excuse. We’ve evolved beyond that, regardless of what some of my counterparts may prove otherwise.